Category Archives: Korah Psalms

“A W E S O M E” (Psalm 47)

“A W E S O M E” (Psalm 47)
FBC Earlville 11-06–16 10:30 AM Rev. J.B. Stopford, Pastor

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“NO QUESTIONS – BE STILL AND KNOW” (Psalm 46)

“NO QUESTIONS – BE STILL AND KNOW” (Psalm 46)
FBC Earlville 10-30–16 10:30 AM
Rev. J.B. Stopford, Pastor

TODAY’S THOTS: My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. WE’LL SEE ABOUT THAT…Buy a dog a toy and the dog will play with it forever. Buy a cat a toy and the cat will play with the wrapper for 10 minutes…It’s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally…AND FINALLY, Is there such a thing as a rhetorical answer?

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“GOD, WHY DO YOU HIDE YOUR FACE?” (Psalm 44)

“GOD, WHY DO YOU HIDE YOUR FACE?” (Psalm 44, note v. 24)
FBC Earlville 10-9–16 10:30 AM
Rev. J.B. Stopford, Pastor

TODAY’S FUNNY: “A Nobel Funny
A man is driving down a country road, when he spots a farmer standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that the farmer is just standing there, doing nothing, looking at nothing.
The man gets out of the car, walks all the way out to the farmer and asks him, “Ah excuse me mister, but what are you doing?”
The farmer replies, “I’m trying to win a Nobel Prize.”
“How?” asks the man, puzzled.
“Well, I heard they give the Nobel Prize to people who are out standing in their field.”

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WHY ARE YOU DOWNCAST? (Psalm 42)

“WHY ARE YOU DOWNCAST” (Psalm 42)
FBC Earlville 10-2–16 10:30 AM
Rev. J.B. Stopford, Pastor

“A Change Funny”:
This morning I was sitting on a park bench next to a homeless man. I started a conversation by asking him how he ended up this way.
He said, “Up until last week, I still had it all. I had plenty to eat, my clothes were washed and pressed. I had a roof over my head. I had TV and internet, and I went to the gym, the pool, and the library. I was working on my MBA online.  I had no bills and no debt.  I even had full medical coverage.”
I felt sorry for him, so I asked, “What happened?  Drugs?  Alcohol?  Divorce?”
“Oh no, nothing like that,” he said. “I just got out of prison.”

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