Don’t Tempt Me !!!

“DON’T TEMPT ME !!!”
FBC Earlville 9-21-14 10:30 AM
Rev. J.B. Stopford, Pastor

INTRODUCTION Today’s Special: “A Rider Funny”
Three old men went into the pro shop after playing 18 holes of golf.
The pro asked, “Did you guys have a good game today?”
The first old guy said, ” I had the most riders ever. I had five.”
The second old guy said, “I had 7 riders, the same as last time.”
The last old man said, “I beat my old record. I had 12 riders today.”
After they went into the locker room, another golfer who had heard the old guys talking about their game went to the pro and said, “I’ve been playing golf for a long time and thought I knew all the terminology of the game, but what’s a rider?”
The pro said, “When you hit the ball far enough to actually get in the golf cart and ride to it – now THAT is a ‘rider’!”

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CLINGING TO HOPE (“Hope” in Romans)

“CLINGING TO HOPE”
FBC Earlville 9-14-14 10:30 AM
Rev. J.B. Stopford, Pastor

INTRODUCTION Today’s Special: “A Musician Funny”
A musician who joined an orchestra on a cruise ship was having a terrible time keeping time with the rest of the band.
Finally, the band leader said, “Look, either you learn to keep time or I’ll throw you overboard. It’s up to you, sync or swim.”

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BROKEN AND POURED OUT (Mark 14:1-9)

“BROKEN AND POURED OUT” (Mark 14:1-9)
FBC Earlville 9-07-14 10:30 AM – Communion Sunday
Rev. J.B. Stopford, Pastor

INTRODUCTION Today’s Special: “A Bird Question”
Q. Why do seagulls live near the sea?
A. If they lived near the bay, they’d be bagels.

The preparation for the “communion” service, v. 1-2, centered around the fear of the people rather than the fear of the Lord. We are challenged, then, to what is true love for Jesus
PRAYER

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GIMME A BREAK! Labor Day Sunday 2014

“GIMME A BREAK” (Mark 4:35-41)
FBC Earlville 8-31-14 10:30 AM
Rev. J.B. Stopford, Pastor

INTRODUCTION Today’s Special: “First Day of School!”
It was the first day of school for these new kindergarteners.
The teacher, Miss Julie, was giving her class instructions. She said, “now, if you have to go to the bathroom, hold up 2 fingers.”
A little voice from the back of the room asked, “How will that help?”

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Why GOD? (Mark 10:13-22)

“Why GOD?” (Mark 10:13-22)
FBC Earlville 8-24-14 10:30 AM
Rev. J.B. Stopford, Pastor

INTRODUCTION Today’s Special: “A Football Funny”
A guy decides to bring his new  girlfriend to a football game. After the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game.
She replies: “Oh it was great, but there is one thing I don’t understand.”
“What don’t you understand?”
The girlfriend replies, “Well, at the beginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first. Then the rest of the game everybody was yelling “get the quarter back, get the quarter back.” So I thought to myself, it’s just a quarter!”

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